The world is always spinning and sometimes it feels as though it is spinning upside down. It’s hard to hold on, even though there’s gravity that ties me to this Earth, I do not feel as though I am a part of it. The Earth spins so out of control that I start to feel it’s heaviness and speed in my chest, I start to suffocate, full of anxiety. I spin around and around and around, I cannot let go. I step back and attempt to catch my breath only to taste the familiar scent of exhaustion. Then I awake. I awake surrounded by the ones who judge us, I awake to the ones who tell me I am not good enough today, I am not good enough any day. I slowly cusp my ears to stop their angry words from entering my soul but they find themselves slipping through the cracks of my fingers and then again, I hear the world judging me for things that I have no control.
I step up and move forward, pushing through the judgmental people, I then realize these people are the same ones who claim they wouldn’t hurt me, claim that they love me and want what’s best for me. They love me? They want what’s best for me? Yet, they hurt me with their knives in my back. It is those that are the reason I do not trust anyone. That I do not give someone the chance to hold the knife and that I do not turn my back and always look people straight in the eyes, never lose eye contact.
The fear of every one else looking upon me, judging me comes to surpass in time. I learn to be my own person, I learn to be a better person, and I learn to adapt to the world around me and instead of attempting to be a part of a world that I do not understand, I move forward and I create my own world, one that I am so familiar with, one that I am comfortable in.
Have you ever just needed someone’s attention and it’s like you’re screaming so loud but yet no one can hear or see you? Almost as though you’ve become a ghost to people that matter to you. Now don’t get me wrong I am very much aware that people have their own lives and they must live them. However, I am a firm believer that we all need the comfort of other people and to have others in our lives. It’s not healthy to be lonely.
What am I getting at?
Three years ago I left the face of the book, friends, family and everything. The tension and drama got so bad that I was unable to handle the stress of FB. Well, last year I realized how important it is to stay in the zone with my kids school and I can do it easily but FB. Which made me reactivate it and thus starting an entire new chapter in my social media frenzy. I am calling it quits again. I don’t want to be that close to people. I don’t want to check my FB 24/7 to see what others are doing, I don’t want to see someone who dislikes me or me dislike them liking things and then creep on their stuff, I don’t want to feel entrapped in the world of FB and all the problems that come with it. Thus… I am not deactivating it but I will not be participating in my FB profile.
What does this even mean?
It means though I will have an active profile and have friends on there I will not be updating you on my life. Now, I may continue to add photos of the kids every now and then. I will be on my group and still running it. I will have messenger installed on my phone in case teachers need to reach me. I will be available for contact. I will also be running my FB Page with the same name.
All Other Social Media….
I have deleted all my social media apps from FB, Snapchat, all the way to Instagram. If you really want to find me I guess you would know how.
I will be updating you on my recent Keto results and blog changes so please follow me to stay up to date!
Food is just wonderful. I love food, it’s just so great to get a tasty meal and get your tummy full. What you don’t know is that 90% of what we call food, really isn’t food at all. If you go to my Facebook page you will see just what I’m talking about. A man finally looked at the box of cereal his kids were eating and discovered it had Trisodium Phosphate in it.
What is Trisodium Phosphate?
Glad you asked! It’s paint thinner. Yes, you read that right. Our kids’ cereal has paint thinner in it. You can read more about it on Online Holistic Health.
Quoted Directly from Livestrong:
If you consume large quantities of trisodium phosphate in its crystallized form, you are likely to experience abdominal pain and a burning sensation in the digestive tract. Large doses may cause chemical shock or collapse, according to the International Programme on Chemical Safety. As a dry powder, trisodium phosphate has a corrosive effect on your skin, eyes and respiratory system. If you work with chemicals, avoid smoking or eating on the job before washing your hands.
You can read more here.
Read the Box! Yes, it takes more time in the store but stop and read everything on the back of package and boxes. You will be completely surprised at what you discover. Get to know your foods!
I have been on a clean eating adventure since the start of 2017. It has been really difficult for me. Because everything has chemicals and awful things in them. You basically have to eat fresh. But, paint thinner in food that is marketed to children? That is beyond disbelief. Please take a moment and educate yourselves before allowing little tummies to eat these awful foods.