Posted in Mixed Six, My Crunchy Life, My Opinions, News Stories, Parenting, Random Thoughts

Mixed Six Mama has launched

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I have been away for longer than I expected to be due to some unforeseen circumstances in my life and concerning my family. I am back, maybe that was the wrong term, I am here and I am different. Have you ever had an experience that changed your entire life forever? So it makes you not the same person? I’ve had many, as I am sure others have had as well.

Trying to find a voice in this world can be quite difficult at times and it’s no fun when you feel that you’re screaming at the top of your lungs but no one can hear, no one cares, and no one understands. I’ve been there time and time again. Though I try to be the best friend I can be, I am not always. I am not always the most supportive person because I am dealing with something myself. Not everyone can always be here for you and that is what I am still learning even though I am an adult. Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself, your children, and your family even through the pain and through the tears.

Welcome to my new blog name and what my blog will be about from this point on. Life events, supporting each other, parenting, and those things that we just don’t always want to talk about.

 

 

 

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Posted in Mixed Six

New Title, New Things

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Hello, all of my fellow bloggers and followers! You will notice that I have decided to change the name of my blog to Mixed Six Mama. This is referring to my children and I find that it fits better. I am going to be going through my blog posts and organizing them. My blog will be mostly my feelings. Some will be based on my parenting life, my wife life, my mom life, and other parts of my life on a deeper level.

I’d love to connect with each and every one of you. You can follow me on FB @mixedsixmama which I’m working on updating the banner and the name. FB declined my name change saying it doesn’t go with what the page represents. I had to explain and appeal that it is actually my blogs name! Wish me luck!

Posted in Mixed Six

Free to Fly

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I really like that I can touch so many followers with my words. It means a lot when you all like my blog entries or my posts and even more when you follow me. I haven’t been able to update as often as I should, as I explained in my last blog entry I have been going through a lot this past year and I am trying to get back on track. Yesterday I was able to do a few loads of laundry. I did not get to fold them but they are washed. This leads me to my next topic… a new blog.

This could go so many ways right now, I could close this blog down and completely open a new one, transfer all my entries to the website I create with that one, or I can keep both blogs going. This one I like because it is personal, it’s about how I feel. The new blog would be based on my children, husband and myself as a mother and wife. It would discuss my challenges and things we face as a family. Please leave your thoughts on what I should do. I’m totally open for discussion.

Keep an eye out on my decision!

Posted in Mixed Six

Purge…AND… I’m out✌🏻

Wait… purge?

Have you ever just needed someone’s attention and it’s like you’re screaming so loud but yet no one can hear or see you? Almost as though you’ve become a ghost to people that matter to you. Now don’t get me wrong I am very much aware that people have their own lives and they must live them. However, I am a firm believer that we all need the comfort of other people and to have others in our lives. It’s not healthy to be lonely.

What am I getting at?

Three years ago I left the face of the book, friends, family and everything. The tension and drama got so bad that I was unable to handle the stress of FB. Well, last year I realized how important it is to stay in the zone with my kids school and I can do it easily but FB. Which made me reactivate it and thus starting an entire new chapter in my social media frenzy. I am calling it quits again. I don’t want to be that close to people. I don’t want to check my FB 24/7 to see what others are doing, I don’t want to see someone who dislikes me or me dislike them liking things and then creep on their stuff, I don’t want to feel entrapped in the world of FB and all the problems that come with it. Thus… I am not deactivating it but I will not be participating in my FB profile.

What does this even mean?

It means though I will have an active profile and have friends on there I will not be updating you on my life. Now, I may continue to add photos of the kids every now and then. I will be on my group and still running it. I will have messenger installed on my phone in case teachers need to reach me. I will be available for contact. I will also be running my FB Page with the same name.

All Other Social Media….

I have deleted all my social media apps from FB, Snapchat, all the way to Instagram. If you really want to find me I guess you would know how.

I will be updating you on my recent Keto results and blog changes so please follow me to stay up to date!

Posted in Mixed Six

Open Your Eyes

Negativity surrounds humanity as if it’s the air we breathe. It dampens our hearts and brings fear into our souls. Negativity can make us numb and it can paralyze us. When we realize that we are the ones who bring negative energy into our own little positive world we will only then defeat and rise above.

For those of you who personally know me, you know that I don’t believe the same ways as everyone else. My mind is like an open book willing to take new information in, but one thing will always be for sure, I believe what I believe and some things you won’t be able to change my mind on.

I believe that we are in control of our own destiny, that every single thing on this Earth has a place. I believe in or nature and that nature heals all. I believe in so many things that a blog post is not enough to get you to open your eyes to all the beautiful and wonderful things in this world.

In order to see things from a different perspective, we must stop judging others for their choices. We must stop judging others for the way they see things and maybe open up to their points of views. After all, there’s an entire universe that is unknowing out there.

To say one type of perspective is wrong would be to say that you 100% know for sure what there is after this life. None of us know what is after this life, we only know what we believe in and have faith in. We only know what we were raised to know or what we taught ourselves.

To conclude this post, let’s get involved in the world around us. Study new and wonderful things. You don’t have to believe in it, just see the possibilities with how things work. Kind of like opening up a computer and figuring out what makes it run.

-queenofhartsxoxo

 

Posted in Mixed Six

Big Family, Small Minds

I don’t always have all six of my boys with me when I go out in public. Most of the time I’m grocery shopping or running errands and prefer to leave them at home with their dad. I most of the time take one or two with me, or maybe even three. Even with three, I get rude remarks or told that I have my hands full, nothing compared to the faces or remarks I get once I tell them this is only half of the children I do have.

I have taken all of my children with me, alone to some place and most of the time I get stares as though I’m this single mother with all these kids. People seem to feel sorry for me and offer me advice. I am not a single mother but people don’t care about that either. Here is just a taste of what I go through on a day to day basis with a big family.

To the car salesman that was questioning my income because he seen me with a cute baby and then started telling me all about his six kids, so I advised I too had six kids. When going over my income he stated: “well, we know that you don’t work, you obviously stay home with the kids.” Really? Is that not sexist or what? Just because I am a woman, I have to stay home and take care of six kids? Or are you stating that I cannot afford to work? Because, I very much do work, in fact, I am the sole provider of our “big family”. I nicely advised him that I do work and that I make xx per hour, which I won’t post here, but I do make pretty good money for a WOMAN and a MOTHER.

To the man in the theater at my sons’ program who stated that people who did not have a $100,000 income should not produce more than one child because they cannot financially provide for more than one child and they should at least give the children a fighting chance in this world. Let me just say that not everyone in this world is rich, some are rich with family and love and that’s what I tend to give my children. It’s not all about money when it comes to raising children, it’s about raising good people to do great things in this world. I do make a decent wage and bring home a decent paycheck. My children always have brand new school clothes and shoes every year. Brand new summer clothes and they do not go with out. My children have everything they need.

To the woman that asked, “you know what causes that right?” If you have to ask the question, do you know what causes it?

There’s much more, I could go on forever. There’s those that assume we are on welfare because we are a family of 8, those that assume that I’m a tired mother and don’t want to take time out of my busy time of being a mother to participate in my children’s school activities. Which I do participate in by the way. There’s those that ask me if I was trying to have a girl… nope we were not trying to have a girl.

I love having a big family. It makes holidays all the more fun and birthdays, well we already have a party right here.

 

 

Posted in Mixed Six, My Crunchy Life, My Opinions, Parenting

A Home Birth: My Sixth Birthing Story-2016

As  I mentioned in my previous post, our last baby was supposed to be our last. I mean, no neither one of us made a permanent birth control decision, but we were content with the five kids we did have. The reason I didn’t want to make it permanent was because we were both so young and maybe one d ay we would want just one more baby. Well, on March 29th, my husbands birthday in 2016 we found out we were having another baby. The entire first few weeks we were anxious to see if this one would be a girl. We even took a  test called Sneek Peak and it’s basically to see if there’s any male fetal DNA  in your blood system. Mine came back a Boy. We thought that since our home was full of boys, that their DNA could have gotten on the package somehow, so we didn’t lose hope. I went to a 3D ultrasound pretty early, 14 weeks to be exact and turned out even that showed a boy. I cried because I knew this was it for me, we couldn’t just keep having babies because we want a girl. It means that I’d never get to go on mommy/daughter dates, etc. I cried because I was so angry that I was upset about the sex of my baby. It’s a legit feeling, though, it’s called gender disappointment. When I had my final ultrasound, I cried again because I knew at that point, he had to be a boy. I eventually got over it. As you will see in my birthing story.

This time it was all different, I didn’t go to a doctors office for check ups and I had a very close friend of mine who had done home births in the past. We live pretty far away from family, so we really had no one to help with the other five boys and we honestly don’t trust strangers. I decided that I was going to give it a shot and have a home birth. I remember when I first met my midwife and student midwife, I was so nervous because I had never done a home birth. They are really wonderful women. To do what they do, it takes something great.

After meeting her the first time, I started going to the birthing center once a month for check up’s until 36 weeks. Then it was every other week after that. I even got to choose whether or not to do the glucose test, you know that nasty orange drink? I could even do an alternative, this time, I decided to sit it out. Since I didn’t have any previous gestational diabetes I thought it would be okay. I had to go to a special lab to get my blood work done and the best part is, she never had to feel all over me when I went to my appointments. They were all pretty simple, she’d check the babies heart, measure the baby and my uterus, we’d talk about random things or she’d make sure she’d address any questions I may have had.

As you know, home birthing has no pain medication options, but, I was willing to take that step since my last son, I had no pain medication.  I was so sure that the baby would get here earlier than expected, I was due on December 2nd, 2016 and the day came and went. I got so frustrated because I was so tired and huge and my body just hurt. I was also really concerned that if I didn’t have him by 42 weeks, I’d be forced to go to the hospital and miss out on my home birth experience. I hit  41 weeks and by that time, it was like time was so slow, I could feel every single second of time becuase I just wanted the baby out. After 42 weeks there are supposedly higher risks your baby will be born still born. Well, 41 weeks hit and the days were counting. I had tried everything to help the baby come, nothing worked. Well,  I finally got out my breast pump and started pumping, I started having steady contractions… I went to get my 4-year-old a bath, as I bent down to wash his hair, my water just trickled down my legs. I remember yelling at my husband telling him “OMFG, MY WATER JUST BROKE” the kids all looked around trying to figure out, what water broke, trying to make me feel better. I was so scared because anytime my water broke before, the contractions got more painful. I started to shake because I was in such a hurry and I called the midwife to let her know. She showed up about 30 minutes later, I filled the birthing pool with hot water, and we waited. No baby. Nothing happened. So, the midwife checked me and said that I was dilated to a 2. That I could call her back if the contractions got heavier.

I tried resting through the night, but I just wanted to get my baby here. I also heard that 24 hours after your water breaks your midwife forces you to go to the hospital and it had me so stressed out because again, I wanted a home birth and at this point, I did not have a backup plan for our kids to be taken care of. I would start to contract and then it would stop when I got into the birthing pool, at this point I had no idea water helps stop contractions. About an hour before the 24-hour mark I contacted my midwife, told her to come on ahead and she showed up about an hour later. She checked me and she said I was a zero this time (weird right?) I almost started to cry when she told me that she has to let me know that after 24 hours there’s a risk of infection, but I do not have to go to the hospital. I was so relieved. She started giving me a tincture to help the contractions, she was going to do a membrane sweep, but she went to do it and it turns out that I was actually dilated to a 5, not a zero.  There was scar tissue which was preventing me from fully dilating and allowing her to check. The bad news? The baby hadn’t dropped far enough for her to do a membrane sweep. So, I took the tincture every 15 minutes, pumped for 15 minutes, walked for 15 on and off for a few hours. Then, once the contractions got steady and close together, I just walked and walked and walked until they hurt so bad I wanted in the water.

My midwife lets me get into the birthing pool to see if the contractions would stay, though they barely got too close together, I was contracting and they were painful. I kept my cool,  I kept it together because I don’t want other women to see me weak. Even though this was my strongest moment. The water was so great, so much relief from the pain, and I could just float there and be weightless with the world. It was wonderful. But, I went into transitioning and the pain just came on. At some point the baby was starting to come, I had to get out of the water, but begged the midwife to just drain the water out with me in there, she refused for safety reasons, which I understand. I got out and the student midwife, who was also a doula helped calm me and she helped me  through the contraction until I was able to get back in the water. After that, I decided I couldn’t do this anymore and I pushed out our sixth son.

After getting to hold my baby for the first time, I didn’t even check to make sure he was a boy until 20 minutes later when the midwife h ad to remind me to check! I was so happy to see him, it was just like a wave of love and emotions came over me. All I wanted to do was hold him. The midwife made sure he was okay, did a newborn screening and made sure I was doing okay before she left.

This experience was one of the greatest. I feel like its the closest I have ever been to one of my newborn babies, the closest the other kids got to be to one of their brothers. We didn’t have nurses coming in and bothering us, we had each other. I got to sleep in my own bed and take a shower in my own shower. I didn’t have to drive home or get in the car and come home, because I was already here, with my new baby. He was so used to all the sounds that when my 2-year-old threw a tantrum he didn’t even budge. It made me feel so str

It made me feel so strong to be able to have my son at home and to be able to have a midwife that was on the same level as me instead of a doctor that would force me to do things I did not want to do or agree with.  To allow my body to do what it was always meant to do and get ready when it was meant to be ready. FullSizeRender-1.jpg